


Simple Word

by Arsenic



Series: Dickens-verse [16]
Category: Bandom
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Sacrifice, dickens-verse - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-26
Updated: 2013-09-26
Packaged: 2017-12-27 17:28:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/981657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arsenic/pseuds/Arsenic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ryan might not be good enough to keep the others safe, but he's not going to stop trying.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Simple Word

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Chibifukurou](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chibifukurou/gifts).



> Huge thanks to beta ihearttwojacks, who seriously put up with some crazy from me on this one. This is for the "sacrifice" square on my hc_bingo card.

It was Ryan's fault Spencer and he got kicked out of the foster home where they met, of course. Spencer was seven, quiet and sad and sweet. Adults liked him, at least on a temporary basis. He'd only had one foster home previously, despite the fact that his parents had died almost two years prior.

Then he allied himself with Ryan, who did things like hiding in the attic, and being mean when he bothered to speak, and generally was no good for anyone. His last three foster parents had told him so, or just sent him away, and his dad had pretty much felt the same way, so Ryan knew it was true. 

The tipping point for this home came when they brought the stray cat back from the bus stop one day. Ryan had known he ought to leave it. Spencer and he had both agreed it was for the best. It was itching like it had fleas, or something worse. 

But Spencer had looked as if he was going to cry, and the cat had taken the cheese from Ryan's afternoon snack from his fingers. Ryan knew bringing it home with them couldn't end well, but he also knew the look in the cat's eye. 

His big mistake, really, was that he'd thought he could convince the foster family that it had been all his idea, and keep Spencer safely out of it. He never learned that his best wasn't good enough.

*

Brendon navigated group homes with shocking ease for someone who'd made it until eight with a family. Granted, he'd been the youngest of twelve. The state severed his parent's rights when his family took a trip into a county four hours away from home and purposely left him there. Evidently, it wasn't the first time they'd done that, but a distant relative had taken in the first kid. Brendon explained solemnly, "We had the devil in us."

Ryan didn't know much about the devil, but he was pretty sure if Brendon had it in him, he'd be a lot less nice and unable to sing like his throat was made of gold. Ryan kept his opinion to himself.

He thought for sure Brendon would find a new family. Brendon shared everything and smiled a lot even when he wasn't feeling like it. But when he came back from his first placement with lips torn at the edges from where he'd been gagged, Ryan started to wonder.

Spencer was pulled from another home when they managed to adopt an infant. Ryan returned from his fifth foster placement with a cut lip and bruised ribs, which, not that he was going to tell anyone, was a lot better than anything he'd gotten from his dad.

Spencer herded Ryan and Brendon into an empty classroom at the state home just to talk, away from everyone. It was the first time in a while Ryan had seen Spencer smile. They got caught and had to clean the bathrooms, but it was worth it.

*

One of the older kids decided Brendon made easy pickings. Ryan hated himself for seeing the logic, but he did. That being said, if it was within Ryan's power, nobody was hurting Brendon, especially not some kid who wasn't any better than the three of them.

Ryan planned it out, something simple, just enough to get the kid away from Brendon for at least a while. It was a stupid prank, really, stealing all of his underwear and socks—the punishment for losing any in the home was a week's worth of dishwashing duty—to let the kid know Ryan could, and would, and then relenting and giving them back.

It was only afterward that Ryan remembered the same mistake he always made: if you were going to kick an enemy, made sure he stayed down.

*

Spencer came down with the flu and got sent to the nurse's rooms until he wasn't contagious, and Brendon was placed with another family at the same time, so when the kids found Ryan and locked him in one of the unused supply closets in the basement area—where none of them were supposed to go—there was nobody to protest that Ryan hadn't run away from the house. Spencer later told him that was why it took almost three days to find him there. They'd checked all the likely places, but none of the places he might have been stashed by someone else.

By the time they managed, Ryan's hands had crusted blood on them from having pounded so violently on the door, and he no longer had a voice, he'd screamed for so long. He'd used a corner to relieve himself in, but the closet wasn't very large, an old broom storage room, really. 

There'd been nothing to eat, and worse, drink in the closet. Ryan had one or two visions of his dad coming for him. He would have screamed at that, if he'd had anything left to scream with. When they found him and opened the door, the light was so painful he dry-heaved until he passed out.

*

He woke up in the hospital with an IV and one of the night staff from the house reading a magazine by the bed. A doctor came in and explained that the IV was just liquids and nutrients, and he'd be allowed to go home as soon as they felt confident he'd been properly rehydrated.

Ryan blinked at the doctor. He didn't have a home.

*

Ryan spent the next three weeks not speaking to anyone besides Spencer. Then Brendon was sent back, evidently for not being 'quite what the family had wanted'—according to Brendon, this meant they'd been more interested in someone younger—and Ryan said, "Missed you," and let Brendon talk himself out.

Spencer must have told Brendon what had happened at some point, because Ryan could _see_ the moment Brendon started plotting revenge. Brendon was not a subtle person.

Ryan told him, "Leave it."

Brendon, who was pretty good about turning the other cheek most of the time, said, "They could have killed you."

"They didn't."

Brendon pulled out his trump card: "Spence hasn't told me to stop."

Ryan looked over at Spencer, who was pretending to ignore them by reading a book. He stared long enough that Spencer finally shrugged his shoulders uncomfortably. Ryan was used to depending on Spencer to be the cool-headed one among them, but since he wasn't taking that role, Ryan said quietly, "You're going to get one of us killed."

Brendon just stared at him mulishly, not giving any signs of agreeing.

*

When it was evident Brendon would not be deterred, Ryan threatened, "I'll run."

It was widely recognized that Ryan might lie, but he didn't make empty threats. Brendon blinked in shock. Spencer, on the other hand, said, "Not the worst idea."

Ryan looked at Spencer. Spencer shrugged. "The three of us could make it. Brendon can sing, and I know you know all the tricks of scavenging."

Blankly, Ryan said, "We'd be on the streets."

What Spencer said next made Ryan aware that this wasn't some idea he'd spouted off the cuff. Spencer folded his arms over his chest. "It's the only way to stay together. Even…even if one of us got adopted, it'd never be in the same home, and we're not family, so they wouldn't have to let us keep in touch."

"We could stay here," Brendon said. "I mean, it kinda sucks, but they feed us."

"They're not gonna stop putting us in homes, trying to find a placement," Spencer argued.

Ryan wasn't so sure about that, but he would admit it wasn't a risk he was particularly inclined to take. Still, the home at least provided shelter and, for the most part, safety. "I don't know," he said.

Brendon changed the subject, and for the time being, they left it at that.

*

Spencer's next placement came with three months of radio silence, and ended with him returning. He was pale and slept a lot and didn't talk about what had happened. Ryan didn't ask.

Brendon, in the meantime, got one over on the kids who'd locked Ryan up—something involving ipecac—and when Ryan stuck to his side afterward, they both ended up with an assortment of bruises and cuts from getting the shit beat out of them. Ryan was actually a pretty decent dirty fighter, but so were the other kids, and they were bigger. Plus, there were five of them to Ryan's two.

Ryan had thought about running away from home back when his dad had still been alive. Now and then, he'd thought about how he would do it. He was older, now, and knew with even more certainty that it could end very badly.

The alternative, though, was staying: watching as Spencer and Brendon disappeared, one way or another, right in front of him. Ryan knew his limits.

*

The plan, such as it was, was to get off the school bus one morning, and slip away. The truth was, the three of them got kicked back and forth from schools so often, it would probably take a while for anyone to realize something was actually happening.

Basically, they would get as deep into the city proper as they could, and go from there. It worked that far.

*

They spent five and a half months fending for themselves. Ryan perfected the art of dumpster diving, while Brendon sang outside coffee shops and diners when it wasn't school hours. School hours would raise suspicion. Spencer found them places to hide: alleys and alcoves and abandoned buildings.

Trying to get a job was also likely to raise suspicion, but when winter really geared up, the three of them needed supplies. At the very least, they needed blankets. Coats and gloves and hats would come in useful as well. And a warm meal every once in a while. Some days, just a _meal_ would have done the trick.

Ryan did what he always did: he took care of the others. Spencer might be the most mature, but Ryan was still the oldest. He didn't care what he had to do to make sure they would all survive. And because he didn't care, because he went to neighborhoods Spencer would _kill_ him for going to, were he ever to find out, Ryan was found by a skinny, quiet pickpocket who introduced himself as Mikey.

Ryan didn't talk to Mikey, didn't answer any of his questions, didn't acknowledge him for days on end. Mikey, in turn, didn't give up on trying to get Ryan to talk with him.

Finally, on a bad day, when he wasn't going to be able to afford food for himself or the others, and there hadn't been anything worthwhile to scavenge, Ryan asked, "What the hell do you want, man?"

Mikey'd crossed his arms over his chest and tilted his head and smiled in a strange way. "To be the helper, for once."

Ryan blinked and stared at Mikey for a long time after that, but the answer was too sincere to be anything but the truth. "You're just another street kid."

"Yeah," Mikey said, rocking on his feet. "Yeah, but there's safety in numbers."

Two days later, Ryan brought Spencer and Brendon along to meet Mikey, who had someone new, Gee, by his side. The three of them followed Mikey and Gee back to "HQ." 

If nothing else, Ryan thought, it sounded like somewhere to crash for a bit, rest just a little. Maybe. For Spencer and Brendon, he was willing to take the chance.


End file.
